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DESIGNER'S DOORWAY

Carmen Hawk

How did you get together with Milla?
CH: WE MET THIRTEEN YEARS AGO IN PARIS MODELING. WE ALWAYS LOVED AND ADMIRED EACH OTHER. I WAS MAKING SHIRTS NAMED AFTER SONGS. SHE WAS WORKING WITH SOME REALLY GREAT DESIGNERS MAKING SOME PIECES. WE SAID LET’S JUST SEE WHAT WE CAN DO.
How has your personal style evolved?
CH: I HAVE THIS NEED TO REINVENT MYSELF ALL THE TIME, DEFINITELY BEFORE EVERY COLLECTION. RECENTLY MY WHOLE THING HAS BEEN I WANT EVERYTHING TO NOT MATCH.

WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, I REALLY WANTED TO BE VERY NORMAL. I WAS BORN IN MISSOURI, BUT AT THAT POINT IT WAS IN ILLINOIS, A COLLEGE TOWN CALLED CARSONDALE. MY MOTHER WAS THE COOL PUNK ROCK MOM. BUT NOBODY ELSE WAS. EVERYONE HAD THEIR IZODS AND THEIR JORDACHE.
SHE WOULD BRAID HER HAIR LIKE BO DEREK, TAKE IT OUT, AND HAVE THIS WILD HAIR. SHE’D WEAR FISHNETS WITH JANE FONDA LEOPARD LEOTARDS OVER THEM AND GO OUT AT NIGHT WITH A LITTLE BLACK TOP. I WAS TRYING TO GET MY HANDS ON ANYTHING PREPPY BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE THE OPPOSITE OF THAT.

THEN IN MY TEENAGE YEARS, I HAD MY BOWIE FIXATION, “THE MAN WHO SAW THE EARTH” THING. THEN I WAS THE WILD ONE AND MY MOM WAS LIKE, “I’VE GOT TO LOOK LIKE THE GOOD GIRL.”

I WAS CUTTING MY HAIR REALLY SHORT, DYING IT RED AND SHAVING OFF MY EYEBROWS, AND WEARING LONG FEMININE DRESSES. A LOT OF THAT WAS INSECURITY AT THAT AGE. I’M GOING TO BE SO DIFFERENT. IT WAS LIKE A SHIELD.

THE OLDER I’VE GOTTEN, THE MORE COMFORTABLE I AM. I CAN HAVE HAIR AND EYEBROWS AND WEAR WHAT I WANT. I THINK IT’S EVOLVED.
Are the shoes Candies? They look like Candies?
CH: THEY ARE ACTUALLY $22, LADIES’ MISCELLANEOUS SHOES. I REALLY DON’T BUY MUCH NEW CLOTHES.
The older I’ve gotten, the more comfortable I am. I can wear what I want.
– Carmen Hawk
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